Mission Blog

Alright, I know I've told lots of people that I'd post the link to my mission blog on here, so here it is!!

http://sisterkyrstinellenmillett.blogspot.com/

My mom will be posting my weekly email and any other updates at least once a week.  If you would like to send me and email letter or package my info can be found in the contact tab on my mission blog.

Well, this is it! I'm signing out of this blog for the next year and a half, but I'll be back with plenty of updates about life, college, cousins, boys, etc :) Thanks for following me through this past year of adventures, feel free to follow me through the next year and a half on my other blog!

Later!!

Goodbyes.

Have I ever told you how much I hate goodbyes? I think I have.  Yeah I hate them more than anything.  I like hellos.  But there aren't a whole lot of those happening right now because I am in a goodbye stage.  And sometimes thats not fun.

I gave my farewell talk today.  I cried A LOT.  I had to say goodbye today to people that I have never gone more than a month or two without seeing.  It was sad to watch each of my best friends and family members leave knowing that I won't be seeing them in a loooong time.

18 months is a long time, but at the same time its really short.  I guess it just depends on the day or how you look at it.

I feel like once I have adjusted, once I know what I'm doing its going to fly by.  Because 18 months of normal life as compared to the rest of your life isn't that long.  But when you take a year and a half out and look at it on standing on its own in front of you it seems like an incredibly long amount of time to leave one's friends, family, and loved ones.

It just takes faith I guess.  This is definitely one of those things that you just have to take a deep breath and step into the darkness of the unknown trusting in Heavenly Father.  So here goes.  I'd be lying if I said I wasn't nervous or a little afraid to take that step but its like what Nephi says when he goes to get the plates, "And I was led by the spirit not knowing beforehand the things which I should do.  Nevertheless I went forth." I don't really know whats in store.  I know it will be hard, I know it will be worth it, and I know its what the spirit has told me to do.  So its time to go forth.

Next Step

Well our wonderful girls trip to Cedar City has come and gone.


We ate giant scones....

We wore colored pants

We got Ice-cream at Bulloch's

We dressed up for plays

We stayed up till the wee hours of the morning

We took lots of pictures at Milt's Steakhouse

And we had an amazing time that we will never forget!

Lately I've been looking at the next few years as a series of steps.  Spring semester of BYU was a step, moving home was a step, New York was a step, and Cedar City was another step.

Up next: Mission.  Bring it.

2. Weeks.

I am freaking out.

2 WEEKS.  FREAK OUT.

In two weeks I will be on the plane heading to Chile for the next 18 months of my life.  FREAK OUT.

I've never been away from home longer than 3 weeks. FREAK OUT.

Me no speako español! FREAK OUT.

Its really weird going places and thinking "This is the last time I will be here in over 18 months" For example, "Grammy's" house has always been one of my favorite places in the world.  If I haven't been there in the past month or two its been far too long.  I need my monthly dose of family and chocolate chip cookies. The 24th of July was my last time there for a year and a half! STILL FREAKING OUT.

Its fine, sometimes I just sit in my room and cry.  And then I write my missionary a letter to make me feel better.

Don't get me wrong, I'm so so so very excited.  I guess it is just finally starting to hit me that this is for real! I'm actually doing this! And soon! Two weeks from yesterday I will be set apart as a missionary.  Two weeks from today I will board the plane to Chile.  Two weeks from tomorrow I will be in the Chile MTC eating different food, trying to understand a different language, in a different part of the world.  ...... YEP I'M FREAKING OUT

Last night as I got in bed and looked at the half-packed suitcases all over my room I sat there and cried.  I hopped on my computer to start typing an email when I saw "The Fourth Missionary" which was saved to my desktop.

I stayed up for another hour or so and read it.  So good.  For anyone planning on serving a mission you NEED TO READ THIS.

I took a good look at my attitude about a mission and found that for the most part I was headed into the mission with the right attitude, but there are a few things I need to do or change to be the best missionary I possibly can.  I want to be the right kind of missionary, with her head and heart in the right place.  Sometimes I don't adjust to change very well.  I can get really sentimental and I often think back on how life used to be and miss it.  This has been the case for most of my life, especially since Nikora left.  But now, its time to put my old life in a box to be opened only after I get home.  I'm not gonna miss life the way it was or the way it is right now before I leave, because its never coming back.  I'm just going to be happy with life the way it is.  I'm going to do my best to be happy with every part of my life as a missionary.  I'm going to do my best to look forward instead of backwards realizing that my mission is where I'm supposed to be.  So for now, there's no where else in the world I'd rather be than Santiago Chile.  I'm freaking out, but I'm ready.

Cumorah

Well... I believe I mentioned I'd be spending a few weeks in Palmyra New York while participating in the Hill Cumorah pageant.  The pageant has come and gone and I'm left with some wonderful friendships and memories that I will always cherish.

I'm sorry I didn't post more during the month.  We didn't get much time at home, when we did it was usually sleeping time.  And that small amount of sleeping time was often split between actually sleeping and letter writing, emailing, uploading pictures etc.  Not a lot of time left for blogging.  Whoops!

So here is a little glimpse of this awesome experience:

 We started out really tired but excited to start our new adventure. Some of us were so tired that we put our clothes on inside out (*cough cough* DAD).  Oh how we love red eye flights..... or maybe not. We were so tired that we got to palmyra, plopped down on a plot of grass and slept for a few hours.  Yes.  We looked like Hobos.

Of course I had to find the Maori Book of Mormon! Or the "Pukapuka A Moromona" I'm still missing my bestie Nikora can you tell?

 Lets just say spencer likes weird new foods.  Horseradish wasabi anyone?

We sure did work hard.  Falling asleep was a common occurrence.

Everybody at pageant spent their free time with their "cast team" which was determined by age group.  Mine was by far the greatest.  Loved it.  Love them.  I will miss spending my days doing crafts, playing games, and making fun crazy memories with friends. 

I spent a few nights "sleeping" with my friends in the dorms.  I'm not sure if we actually got much sleep, but it was fun!!

One of my favorite parts of pageant was sharing my testimony and a message with audience members before the show.  I love missionary work and I love sharing my testimony that Christ lives and loves us.  Guess who I found? Elder Zachary Harris (a friend from high school) has been serving his mission in New York for about 18 months now, so good to see him!!

I was especially grateful for the 3 opportunities I had to visit the Sacred Grove.  There is an amazing feeling of peace there.  I know that Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ appeared to Joseph Smith.  And now I can say that I've been there where it actually happened!

Pageant was great.  BUT there was one thing I hated about it.  The ending.  Come on? Why can't we just stay here and do this forever? Ok jk jk I understand it has to end and we have to get back to real life but man I really hate goodbyes.  People come into my life, I love them, and then they have to leave.  Thats just how it works.  I get it. But I hate it.  It happened in high school, summer trips, college, and it even happened with Nik.  Today it happened with pageant, I had to say goodbye to these great friends.  Most of us will be serving missions over the next two years which means we won't see each other for a while, God be with you till we meet again! 

I'm so grateful for this opportunity.  It gave me the emotional and spiritual boost I needed.  It helped me to realize why I'm going on a mission, and how much I'm going to love it.  It helped me understand what Jesus is like and how much I want to be like him.  My heart has truly changed and I'm ready for the next big step!

I can't wait to get out there and serve at the same time time as my best friend. My testimony of missionary work has grown over the last few weeks and I'm so blessed to have so many people I love out serving the Lord.  

Bring On The Adventures!!

I'm ready.  I can't say that enough.  Its time for a new adventure, new places, new faces.  I'm ready.  I've been ready for a looong time.  And finally its almost here!! Tomorrow night I will be off to New York for a few weeks, it couldn't come any sooner!!

For now I'm just trying to pass the time without getting overexcited.

So I've been sitting in my room writing emails to a favorite missionary of mine:

And passing even more time taking silly pictures with my little brother.  I think we are all a little restless to leave. 

I'll be sure to post plenty of pictures, but for now I'm checking out!!

Temple

I had the opportunity to go to the Oquirrh mountain temple yesterday! It was my first time going since I received my own endowments two weeks ago.

The feelings I get at the temple are indescribable, I'm so blessed to live so close to so many of them!

Overall I was just impressed by the importance of family.  I know that this gospel is centered around that!

Emotions.

Today has been emotional.  I could end the blog post right there.

BUT... if you want to keep reading about the details feel free... just know that it might not make any sense... and there is probably far more written about Nikora and my feelings than you'd ever want to know.

Sooooo I got to talk to Nikora today.  BEST DAY EVER.   So then why have I been crying on and off all day? Answer: Because I'm a girl. An emotional girl.

My day started at 5 am.  Full of worries, confusion, apprehension, excitement. I missed my test yesterday and wasn't sure how I was going to fix it with my professor today, hence the worry.  Then I let my mind wander through all of the possible things that could go wrong and stop me from talking to my best friend (i.e. what if talking to him is just too sad? what if its too happy?what if he doesn't want to talk to me? what if he doesn't remember me? what if I get hit by a car on my way over there and can't make it because I'm in the hospital? what if an elephant steps on my car while I'm driving and I get stranded on the freeway?) Obviously some of my worries were more reasonable than others.... and none of them actually happened

Needless to say, I did not get stepped on by an elephant.

I made it to Nik's house and the wait began.  It felt like a year before the call came from Elder Anderson. As soon as I heard his voice the tears began flowing again.  I have the amazing ability to feel many emotions at once, sadly I do not have the ability to keep ANY of them in.  I was happy, relieved, excited, sentimental... but most of all it was just good to hear his voice.  Its funny how well you can know a person but how poorly your mind can imagine them.  I don't know if that makes any sense but often times I try to think of where Nik is and what he is doing and I can half create it. But I can never fully imagine what it feels like to be with him or talk to him.  That is only a feeling I can get from actually interacting with him.  It was so good to remember what it feels like to have a best friend. I can't even tell you how good it felt.

Nik got to call twice, in-between calls I took a nap and cried in Nik's basement.  Sooo many memories down there.  Whether it was talking for hours, watching movies, working on homework projects, etc we were almost always spending time down there.  I fell asleep crying but I woke up to these cute puppies scratching at the door.  Sam and Frodo, they always know how to make someone feel better!

I'll spare you the details of the next long call, all I have to say this that it was WONDERFUL.

Aaaaaaaand saying goodbye was really hard....

I went on a walk by the lake afterwards and just reflected on everything I was feeling.  I felt a little numb during the drive home.  When I got back to provo waterworks began again and I've cried harder than I have in 41 days.  Only 22 months left.  I can do anything for 22 months.  

Mission Envy.

As you all know, I take particular delight in writing this kid:

Isn't he cute? 

I love writing him and I am so very happy for him, but in all honesty I am green with envy.  I wish we could switch places.  At the moment he is training to be a missionary and in less than a week he will be off to Germany to serve the Lord.  I have a severe case of Mission Envy. 

I am ready to get out of Provo and do something even better with my life!! Hearing about all of Elder Anderson's experiences just make me want to get out there and get started!

I'm stuck living normal life without him and he is feeling the spirit and serving others 24/7! Jealousy!!

I visited his family like I mentioned in this post.  They posted some pictures from our visit, I figured I'd share! 

Nik's countdown chart may be a little empty now (in fact I cried when I saw how empty it was) BUT eventually time will pass, I'll focus on other things and before you know it I'll be writing some sappy post about how happy I am to have my best friend back!!

This is the painting I did for Nik's family!! I was flattered to see how much Nik's family liked it.  I was not expecting them to think it was that great!! 

Hopefully I'll get to see them all again when Nik calls from the airport.  I can't wait until it is my turn to leave!!

Ready.

Life has been busy, fun, emotional, rewarding, stressful, and a bunch of other things.  I've been experiencing lots of change and I can't say that I'm always the best at handling it, but as I've tried my best to accept change as God's way of preparing me for the things to come it has all been a little easier.  

I went through the temple on Tuesday! This was one change I was happy to make, I can't wait to go back again there was such a wonderful feeling of peace there that I haven't felt anywhere else!

The best part about it was getting to go through at the same time as my sister.  I'm so glad that through all of this preparation for the future I have someone else to do it with me!!

What a blessing it was to have so many family members there with me! I love that this gospel is centered around eternal family relationships!

As I take each step towards getting ready for my mission I can't help but get impatient to leave.  Its funny how Heavenly Father gives you experiences and trials to help you know that it is time to let go of life here and dedicate your life to serving others for a while.  

I feel like Nik leaving was the first step. Then realizing that I'm sick of school and need a break.  I love BYU and I love Provo but as all of my friends have been leaving and things have been changing I have realized that for now, theres nothing left for me here, I NEED to go on a mission.  I love socializing with a bunch of college kids but for the first time I don't really want to as much.  I just want to go dedicate my time to the Lord.  Instead of staying out till 3, going out to eat, and hanging out with friends I've been researching my mission, reading my scriptures, going to the temple, and writing Elder Anderson.  When Kyrstin would rather have quiet time than social time, its a sure sign that its time to go.  I am ready.  Maybe not completely prepared, but emotionally, I'm ready.  

MTC....BYU Campus?

Did you know that technically the MTC is BYU Campus? Guess what that means.  Yep, its close.  REALLY close.  Guess what that means? Elder Anderson and I go to the same temple.  Sometimes it is really hard knowing he is RIGHT THERE and I can't even see him or talk to him!!!

Story time.

Did you know that on Pdays a missionary in the MTC can go to the temple? I did.  What I didn't know was that every Wednesday when I go to the temple grounds to study my scriptures and Temple Prep materials Nik and I had been missing each other by a few minutes.  Until yesterday.

I was walking up to the temple about to cross the street to the corner by the MTC.  Of course the thought of seeing Nik had passed my mind but I was almost positive that I would be just fine, I had come at this exact time 3 weeks in a row, I figured I was safe.  I wasn't.  The walk signal flashed on and I was about to walk across the street when Elder Anderson and his companion came around the corner.  10 ft away.  So close to my best friend and do you know what I did? I put my head down and stood there.  Now I had to wait for the other traffic signal to switch so I could get to the temple using a slightly different route.  That minute felt like an hour.  10 FEET AWAY.  I turned to look at him and he had his back towards me talking to his companion.  Agh so awkward.

So I took the long way to the temple knowing that Nik would be cutting through the field and would get there much sooner than I would.  WRONG.  We got there at the same time.  Nice going Kyrstin.  So I hid behind a bus stop pavilion.  FAIL. After he had walked through the gates of the temple grounds I figured it was safe to go to my little spot in the field below.

He was turned around looking at me from the fountain at the top of the Hill, I looked away and started sobbing.  Then I heard a bunch of sister missionaries say, "What is Elder Anderson doing?" I looked up and saw him and his companion walking back down the hill. PANIC. PANIC. PANIC.  They yelled my name and waved.  I waved back.  They stood there.  Was I supposed to go talk to them? Looking back now I really wish I had.  But I didn't know what the right thing to do was.  So.  I sat there.  And cried.  And they eventually turned around and headed back to the temple.  He turned around one more time and waved.  I love that boy.  23 more months.  Dang I hope I did the right thing.

Fun & Games..... & Tears.

My emotions have been all over the place.  Mostly the past week or so has been a happy one.

Jade graduated!! I am going to miss her!!! We had a great time at Texas Roadhouse.  I may have been overkill on the stories about Nikora and I but thats just what happens anytime we go somewhere that Nik and I used to visit lots. It was such a happy, kinda sad, but mostly pretty happy day.  Word for the wise: If you are waiting for a missionary DO NOT watch homecoming videos.  It does WIERD things to your emotional stability.  It definitely threw my day out of whack haha.

We play TENNIS!!........ Ok lets be real we all rejoice like we are Wimbledon champions if we manage to hit the ball back and forth more than 5 times.  It is a work in progress.

LOOOOVVVE my roomies.  Seriously they are the sweetest girls and know how to make a rough day so much better!

Julayne just likes beating me up....jk jk

This week has been full of fun times.  I've needed it.  It has been a month since Nikora left and while I am still among the living I'm sometimes surprised my heart doesn't just give out.  Ok maybe not for reals but its been hard!!! Definitely fits the description of "Emotional Roller Coaster" 

I went up to Daybreak to visit Nik's family.  I cried when I passed the temple where we did baptisms for the last time, I cried when I passed the lake where we would sit and talk till late at night, I cried when I passed the little town homes that he wants to live in someday, then I composed myself as I pulled up to his house.  But then I looked at his cute little house and heard his puppies barking inside and I just lost it all over again.  They opened the door and gave me hugs and the faucet of tears just kept running.  But don't worry it only ran for the first hour that I was there.  The rest of the time was really great, I was able to just talk about Nik and everything that happened without getting fake sympathy or that glazed over look when people are soooo done listening to me talk about my best friend.  We laughed harder than any of us have laughed in the last month and I felt more at peace than I had in a long time.  It was so good to be back. 

Staying at my house instead of my apartment for Memorial Day weekend was a huuuuuge blessing.  Being with my family and my cousins family gave me so much to take my mind off of school, Nik, work, Nik, Nik, and did I mention Nik? It was really nice to be somewhere that wasn't just filled with memories of Elder Anderson and I.  We played games, watched movies, went to 7 peaks, talked, ate delicious food, and had a fantastic time.  

(Notice I'm not in the pic, I was visiting Niks family but the whole weekend went about like this)

I came home from Memorial Day weekend feeling emotionally stable (something that hasn't happened in a month haha) and really happy.  

I even got pics and videos from the Elder!!!

He sent me his memory card and he still had pictures from our last salt lake trip on it :)

Good to see he likes his birthday present (I made him a quote book and didn't get it to him until 3 months after his birthday.... bad girlfriend award haha)

Nik is DL over a bunch of really great guys!!

I really am so proud of him for deciding to serve a mission.  I cannot even wait till I can be out there serving too! It sounds difficult.  Probably more difficult than anything I have ever done.  BUT it sounds so incredibly worth it.  

Well its been fun and games for the past week with a few tears in-between.  I'm not sure that my emotional stability is still in tact.  It may have been thrown off with yesterdays events. But I will write a separate blogpost about that story. Yay for Provo.